“Then Jonathan made a covenant with David, because he loved him as his own soul” (1 Sam. 18:3).

This year’s Men’s Weekend completes a trilogy of studies on brotherhood. Two years ago, we studied Paul’s companions. Last year, we studied Jesus’ friendships with his disciples. We decided to stick with the theme one more year, completing the “trilogy” of studies with a look at David’s inner circle. The goal of this weekend was more PURPOSEFUL, Christ-centered relationships, investing in each other’s walk with the Lord to create an eternal impact. We don’t just want to grow closer to one another but help one another grow closer to God. 

Nathan

Brotherhood in Christ is about more than getting along. When you care, you step up and stand up for a brother or sister’s future, faith, and long-term well-being. We “consider how to stir up one another to love and good works” (Heb. 10:24), challenging each other to grow in Christ. Like “iron sharpens iron” — through accountability, love, and the occasional courageous conversation — “one man sharpens another” (Prov. 27:17).

Some of the boldest words a prophet ever spoke came when Nathan convicted David of his adultery with Bathsheba and brought about her husband’s death. Nathan looked the king in the eye and said, “You are the man!” (2 Sam. 12:7).

But there’s more to the story than those four mighty words.  Nathan could’ve started with the accusation, but instead, he shaped his message to help David hear and repent. He knew David, the shepherd boy turned anointed of God, and he began with a sheep story that resonated with him.

It’s no secret that influence grows as our relationships grow. That influence allows us to support, strengthen, and correct one another.

Nathan didn’t just show up in David’s life that day. He was the one who gave David the covenant promise about his house (2 Sam. 7). Later, he helped protect David’s succession when Adonijah tried to take the throne (1 Kings 1). During those years as a fellow servant of God and spiritual counselor, David knew who Nathan was (and vice versa).

It’s no secret that influence grows as our relationships grow. That influence allows us to support, strengthen, and correct one another. We can’t control each other’s actions. But we can “speak the truth in love” (Eph. 4:15) rather than letting a friend “wander from the truth” (James 5:19-20).

Do you have the courage to say what your friend ought to hear? And do you try to listen and receive counsel in humility? Nathan spoke up, giving David the hard truth he needed in a way that helped him hear it. David listened and acknowledged his sin before Nathan and the Lord. What’s more challenging for you — what Nathan did or what David did? 

Mighty Men

David was chased into the wilderness and lived on the run for years. But he wasn’t alone. As he built and stabilized his kingdom, he had a group called “David’s mighty men, who gave him strong support in his kingdom, together with all Israel, to make him king, according to the word of the Lord” (1 Chron. 11:10).

The mighty men, also called “the thirty” (2 Sam. 23:8,18-19), began as a ragtag bunch with bonds forged in adversity (1 Sam. 22:2; 1 Chr. 12:4). But they became David’s most trusted, elite warriors, a special forces unit taking on impossible missions (1 Sam. 23:13-17). They often worked together in smaller squads as they group battled side-by-side with David to accomplish the will of the Lord (1 Chr. 11:10). Uriah the Hittite was one of David’s Mighty Men (2 Sam. 23:39), which seems to make David’s betrayal even worse (if that’s even possible).

I recently had a conversation with a man who felt completely alone that it troubled him to discuss his relationships. It broke my heart because Christ invited us to be friends with him (John 15:12-15). And with that comes a family of “friends” (3 Jn 15) who love him and each other. We’re in a war we’re not meant to wage alone, “engaged in the same conflict” as we “are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, and not frightened in anything by your opponents” (Phil. 1:27-28,30).

What can we apply from the Thirty to this unit fighting together (Eph. 6:10-18)? Do we show the same courage and solidarity we see in and in the early church (Acts 4:23-37)?

Jonathan

But no study of David’s friends and fellow servants would be complete without a look at his “knit to the soul” friend Jonathan (1 Sam. 18:1). As heir to Saul’s throne, Jonathan could have opposed David. Instead, he “delighted much in David” (1 Sam. 19:1) and “loved him as his own soul” (1 Sam. 18:1,3). David had a covenant with Jonathan, and he trusted Saul’s son with his life (1 Sam. 20).

Are you the kind of friend who loves others as yourself and stands true in trial?